Ten days ago, I had a vasectomy. I took a day off from work to get it done because I knew I was going to need a few days of rest before going back to work. And it was the absolute easiest procedure. The whole thing took less than 30 minutes, and I was out of there.
The reason why I’m writing about it now is two-fold: 1) I want to normalize getting a vasectomy for other men, and 2) I wanted to get a little distance from the day of so I could talk about the recovery process. So, first let me talk about the procedure itself, then let me add some other thoughts I have at the end.
The Procedure
The procedure itself is remarkably simple. First they give you an injection of lidocaine at the top of the scrotum. It’s a quick stick with a slight burn that’s less intense than getting a tattoo. The burn itself lasts less than three seconds and it’s over. The doctor ended up giving me a second injection because the first didn’t fully numb me, but I never even felt that one.
Then, they make a very small incision at the top of the scrotum. This is obviously where they do all the actual work. It’s so slight that, were it not for the stitch at the end, you’d hardly even know it was there.
From there, they reach in with a tool and hook the vas deferens on one side and slowly work it from where it naturally lies at the back of the scrotum to the front where the incision is. Apparently not every guy experiences a cramp-like spasm during this process, but I did. And every time I had a spasm, the doctor hit me with more lidocaine to make the muscle relax. Ultimately, he had to do twice on my left side, and three times on my right.
Once the vas is at the incision, they pull a loop of it through and cut, cauterize, and stitch it before pushing it back in and repositioning it where it belongs. Then they switch sides and repeat the process.
Finally they close the incision with a dissolvable stitch and let you get dressed and get out of there. Again, less than 30 minutes and I was done. It was one of the simplest procedures I’ve ever experienced.
Recovery
Under doctor’s orders, I went home and put my feet up for the next three days. The first day I applied an ice pack for a few hours to help with swelling, but even with that, there was practically no swelling and no bruising at all that I noticed, even though they said that bruising is not uncommon.
My groin was sore for a week, a lot the first couple of days of recovery and less with every passing day. By exactly one week out, there was no more soreness at all. The only minor annoyance has been the dissolvable stitch, which has started to come out a little and is irritating the area around the incision. But even with that, I can’t complain. Overall, this has been a very minor inconvenience to ensure that I can’t produce any more children.
Social Commentary
Having gone through this process, I’m particularly flabbergasted that so many men are either reluctant or outright refuse to get vasectomies. I know guys are sensitive about their junk, whether it be out of fear of pain or because they fear that it will somehow emasculate them. I can understand being afraid of pain, which is why I wrote this so as to show that the pain is minimal. And frankly, women go through so much more pain and discomfort that we as men inconveniencing ourselves for a week or so seems like the very least we can do.
As for the latter position that a guy will somehow lose his Man CardTM, well, there’s not much I can do about all the fragile male egos out there. Grow a pair, fellas, and get snipped. Doing so solves a remarkable number of problems without putting the weight of responsibility on the women in our lives. It’s just being a responsible adult.
